10 Steps in Either Direction: Your Relationship to Yourself

Today's blog is by Todd Stewart, who provides acupuncture, meditation, energy work and qi gong at Healium.


This isn't about any particular modality or treatment style or whatever. It's about relationship.

Of course, whatever treatment you're getting is fine. That's the door that was closest to you at the time. For whatever reason(s) - and a lot of them would be unconscious - you've chosen to receive a treatment (or therapy) of This Type from This Person. Okay, cool.

Keep in mind: it's/we're just a tool or resource for you to use. What's more important than that, though, is this:

Whatever they/we do with you is not as important as what you do with yourself.

Another way of saying it:

Anything you "have done to you" pales in significance when placed next to the most fundamental thing:

Your relationship to yourself.

An extension of this is:

Your relationship to your major complaints, or primary pathology, or whatever it is that bugs you most.

Because, right, your relationship to anything defines how that thing influences your life. Your relationship to YOURSELF determines what sort of life you live.

Todd is also Vice President of the Healium Ninja Auxiliary.

Anything that comes from without won't "stick" as well if you don't help it stick by changing yourself from within.

See, we all choose what direction we face (albeit usually unconsciously). There are two directions: better and worse. What's your choice? What's your preference? If you're reading this, I'd guess, overall, it's "better."

It's like each of us is standing in the middle of a misty mountain path, and we can only see 10 steps in either direction. Each step we take, forward or backward, we can still only see 10 steps. Step, step, step: we can still only see the same distance.

So, no matter where you are in your own health journey, it is a moment-by-moment conscious decision to keep moving in the direction you'd prefer to move in.

Every. Single. Day.

Yeah. It never ends. Sometimes, sure, take a break, check out the view, have a plateau, integrate the work you've done. Nice one. Passivity is as essential as activity. Night follows day, winter follows summer follows winter.


Don't try to change the thing, try changing your relationship to it, instead. Play a game, there are five steps:

1. Awareness. You're already aware that something is bugging you. Tick.

2. Acknowledgement. Just acknowledge it's bugging you. Drop the judgment, drop the opinion, drop the label. It is what it is. Okay. (You can also acknowledge that you judge it, after you're aware that you judge it . . . ).

3. Acceptance. You can then accept that you have "this" (it's not you, it's a thing you have).

4. Appreciation. In what way does this improve your life? What have you learnt about yourself? (This is the step people usually find the most challenging.

5. Allowance. The above being done, sit back and relax. Let the thing change. Because you've changed how you feel about it. This can't help but change it.


Keep it light, keep it fun. Say hi to your mum for me. :o)